Six months!

So tomorrow it's been six months since Gary's passing. It' hard to believe it's been that long already. In one way it feels like forever ago, because every minute of the past six months have been so painful. On the other hand I can't believe we have already gone on living for six months without him. We miss him so much! I miss my partner, my confidant and my everything. Most nights when Hayden goes to bed, he wants to talk about Gary and that he misses him. It really sucks! I know God has a plan for everyone, it's just very hard to understand the plan of taking a good father away from his small children, when there are other dead beats out there that don't deserve to be here! Maybe one day I will understand it!

On the other hand, I've learned a lot over the past six months. I used an electric drill to hang curtain rods, burnt of my eyebrows turning on the grill, had my air conditioner and ice maker fixed, had the roof and siding replaced, had two flat tires, written a will, been to court, and learnt not to mix wine, champagne and rum in one night! "What doesn't kill you will make you stronger"

I'm also really thankful. I'm thankful for the wonderful years we had together and all the great memories! I am really thankful for the great children we made together. I'm thankful for the wonderful friends and family we have, that have helped me and the kids through this hard time. I'm thankful for that we can go on living without the stressors of having to move and me having to return to full time work! And finally I'm thankful that we are still alive, because living is after all pretty wonderful! Gary we miss you!